Shortly after the funeral, Uriah Smith employed his editorial column in the August 23 Review to inform the church about Ellen White's state of health and her plans for the future. He reported that for the past few days she had gained strength quite rapidly. She spoke to church members in the Tabernacle Sabbath afternoon, August 20, for fifty minutes, "with great clearness of mind and strength of voice." Her theme was the lessons to be learned from the uncertainty of life, and the relation that the Christian should maintain with his Lord. She coveted this opportunity for a last meeting with fellow believers in Battle Creek before leaving for the seclusion of Colorado.
The next Monday, August 22, with her two daughters-in-law, Emma and Mary, she left for Colorado, where she expected to spend a few weeks in retirement and rest and rejuvenation.
A few days were spent in Boulder, where lived the McDearmons, Emma's parents. Ellen spent most of one day writing out the circumstances connected with her husband's death (Manuscript 6, 1881) for use in the In Memoriam pamphlet in preparation at Battle Creek. In this statement she dwelt quite fully upon their experience during the two weeks previous to his death, especially their praying seasons and conversation that showed that James had some foreboding of a change and that he was prepared. Ellen closed her statement with words of appreciation to friends in Battle Creek and those who assisted her:
I wish to express my appreciation of the kindness, attention, and sympathy extended to both my husband and myself by the physicians and helpers of the Sanitarium. All exerted themselves to the utmost for our relief and recovery. Especially would I acknowledge with gratitude Dr. Kellogg's skillful care as a physician, as well as his kindness and sympathy as a brother and friend, in my sickness and bereavement.
To those also who brightened my sickroom with flowers, I extend my sincere thanks. Not one of these favors is forgotten. I have also been cheered and comforted by letters of sympathy from absent friends. I have not strength to respond to these separately, but I thank all for their words of love in my affliction.--Manuscript 6, 1881 (see also In Memoriam, p. 57).
Then with Mary she was off to "White's Ranch" and the little cottage they owned on a few acres in the mountains near Rollinsville, Colorado.
So Alone in the Mountains
Although her health was improving and she was sleeping quite well, she was unable to apply herself yet to writing. As she looked from the cottage to the pine-covered hills close by she was reminded of the many happy times she and James had enjoyed there. But this time he was not there to share her thoughts and feelings. She wrote:
I have been among the mountains, but alone.... Alone, alone! God's dealings seem mysterious, His purposes unfathomable; yet I know that they must be just, and wise, and merciful. It is my privilege and duty to wait patiently for Him, the language of my heart at all times being, "He doeth all things well."--Life Sketches of Ellen G. White, 257.
Willie had remained in Battle Creek to work with Edson in taking care of the financial affairs relating to James White's estate. To him she wrote on September 12:
I miss Father more and more. Especially do I feel his loss while here in the mountains. I find it a very different thing being in the mountains with my husband and in the mountains without him. I am fully of the opinion that my life was so entwined or interwoven with my husband's that it is about impossible for me to be of any great account without him. We have tested the mountains under most unfavorable circumstances.--Letter 17, 1881.
For her, Colorado with its beautiful mountains had lost its lure. She did some sewing to while away the time, but only little writing. Butler was urging her to attend the General Conference session being planned for November or December. The California camp meeting would be held a little before that, and she was debating in her mind whether to return for the winter to their comfortable home in Battle Creek or to go to California and occupy their Oakland home. As to the General Conference session, she told Mary that she "must have further light before consenting to go in her present state of health" (MKW to WCW, September 14, 1881). She finally decided in favor of California, for she felt it would not be prudent to return to the East with the burdens she would have to face there.
A Solemn and Far-Reaching Testimony
Leaving "White's Ranch," Ellen White was back in Boulder for the weekend of September 24 and 25. Having decided not to return to Michigan, on Sunday she wrote a testimony--a solemn and far-reaching testimony to be read at the Michigan camp meeting. When published later, it filled nearly thirteen Testimony pages:
Dear Brethren and Sisters Who Shall Assemble at the Michigan Camp Meeting:
I feel a deeper interest in this meeting than in any other that has been held this season. Michigan has not had the labor which she should have had. God has planted important institutions among you, and this brings upon you greater responsibilities than upon any other conference in the whole field. Great light has been given you, and few have responded to it; yet my heart goes out in tender solicitude for our beloved people in Michigan.--Testimonies for the Church, 5:9.
After writing of the responsibility of the ministers, she turned to Battle Creek College, now under the leadership of a new president, Dr. A. McLearn, an Adventist of but a few months. She wrote that it was founded to prepare young men to labor for God, and that the leading men in the college should be men of piety and devotion. "They should make the Bible the rule and guide of life, giving heed to the sure word of prophecy."--Ibid., 5:12.
But she pointed out:
Much that has no part in Christ is allowed a place among us. Unconsecrated ministers, professors, and teachers assist Satan to plant his banner in our very strongholds.
The design of our college has been stated again and again, yet many are so blinded by the god of this world that its real object is not understood.... Some of the teachers have been scattering from Christ instead of gathering with Him. By their own example they lead those under their charge to adopt the customs and habits of worldlings. They link the hands of the students with fashionable, amusement-loving unbelievers, and carry them an advance step toward the world and away from Christ.--Ibid.
The Lord never designed that our college should imitate other institutions of learning. The religious element should be the controlling power.... I have been shown that, as a people, we are departing from the simplicity of the gospel. Many are in great peril.--Ibid., 5:14-18.
Near the end of her communication she made reference to the special work laid upon her, and spoke with directness:
Let none entertain the thought that I regret or take back any plain testimony I have borne to individuals or to the people. If I have erred anywhere, it is in not rebuking sin more decidedly and firmly. Some of the brethren have taken the responsibility of criticizing my work and proposing an easier way to correct wrongs. To these persons I would say: I take God's way and not yours. What I have said or written in testimony or reproof has not been too plainly expressed. God has given me my work, and I must meet it at the judgment....
Within a few weeks past, standing face to face with death, I have had a near look into eternity. If the Lord is pleased to raise me from my present state of feebleness, I hope, in the grace and strength that comes from above, to speak with fidelity the words which He gives me to speak. All through my life it has been terribly hard for me to hurt the feelings of any, or disturb their self-deception, as I deliver the testimonies given me of God. It is contrary to my nature. It costs me great pain and many sleepless nights.... I will walk in humility before God, doing my work for time and for eternity.--Ibid., 5:19, 20.
The testimony continues with a page more, dealing with her work and the difficulties she faced in performing the unpleasant tasks of a messenger for God. This message was received in Michigan in the midst of the camp meeting, but for some reason church leaders failed to bring it before the people for whom it was intended (Ibid., 5:9). This circumstance was one of the first of a series that was to bring distress to Ellen White.
The California Camp Meeting
With the California camp meeting to be held in Sacramento in the offing, she with her helpers, left Boulder for Oakland on October 2. Physically she was steadily gaining ground, and when the camp meeting opened on Thursday evening, October 13, at East Park Grove, she was there. In light of her severe illness, it was anticipated that she would not be able to speak much, but she spoke almost every afternoon. J. H. Waggoner reported that her address Sabbath afternoon, October 15," was equal to the best effort we ever knew her to put forth." (The Signs of the Times, October 27, 1881).
Waggoner added, "Besides this, her counsel was of great value throughout the meeting." Perhaps the most important business item introduced at the meeting was in taking steps "to establish a school by Seventh-day Adventists in California." Ellen White, with her sense of the importance of Christian education, was most certain to have spoken to this.
A committee was appointed to carry this intention into effect as soon as possible, to meet the present want, also to examine and report in regard to a permanent location. A vote was taken to invite Professor Brownsberger to come and take charge of it. This is a matter over which the minds of the brethren have been much exercised for some time, and we cannot express our gratification that our desires in regard to it are likely to be speedily fulfilled.--Ibid.
A school board was elected, with W. C. White as chairman. In addition to J. H. Waggoner, editor of the Signs, five prominent businessmen and farmers served on the board.
Through the remaining months of 1881 and into the early part of 1882, Ellen White, residing first in Oakland and then in Healdsburg, spent much of her time visiting the churches. At first she went to those nearby, in Oakland and San Francisco, and then included Petaluma, Healdsburg, St. Helena, Napa, Williams, Arbuckle, and Santa Rosa. She was not ready to apply herself to a heavy program of writing. On occasion she was invited to speak in other than Seventh-day Adventist churches. Then, taking the subject matter of her addresses made here and there, she prepared a series of weekly articles for the Signs that ran under the general heading "Among the Churches." Much of the travel was by carriage, Ellen White doing the driving. One report concerning the thirty-five-mile trip from Healdsburg to St. Helena is highly descriptive:
Brother and Sister Harmon [in whose comfortable home she had spent a few days] thought it unsafe for Sister Rogers and myself to make the journey alone at this season of the year. Hence they accompanied us, their team leading the way, while ours followed. When we left Healdsburg, the fog was so dense that we could see but a short distance before us, but in a few hours the mists dispersed, and we enjoyed beautiful sunshine.
The road though Knight's Canyon, always perilous to the inexperienced traveler, is often impassable in the rainy season. We were very thankful for a pilot in this part of our journey. I dared not look either to the right or left to view the scenery, but, holding the lines firmly, and guiding my horse in the narrow passage, I followed our leader. Carelessness here would have been fatal. Had our horse turned out of the right path, we should have plunged down a steep precipice, into the ravine below.
As we rode along in almost breathless silence, I could but think how forcibly this dangerous ride illustrates the Christian's experience. We are making life's journey amid the perils of the last days. We need to watch carefully every step, and to be sure that we are following our great Leader.--Ibid., January 26, 1882