It is the boast of the present age that never before did men possess so great facilities for the
acquirement of knowledge, or manifest so general an interest in education. Yet despite this
vaunted progress, there exists an unparalleled spirit of insubordination and recklessness in the
rising generation; mental and moral degeneracy are well-nigh universal. Popular education does
not remedy the evil. The lax discipline in many institutions of learning has nearly destroyed their
usefulness, and in some cases rendered them a curse rather than a blessing. This fact has been
seen and deplored, and earnest efforts have been made to remedy the defects in our educational
system. There is urgent need of schools in which the youth may be trained to habits of
self-control, application, and self-reliance, of respect for superiors and reverence for God. With
such training, we might hope to see the young prepared to honor their Creator and to bless their
fellow men.
It was to secure these objects that our own College at Battle Creek was founded. But those
who endeavor to accomplish such a work, find that their undertaking is fraught with many and
grave difficulties. The evil which underlies all others, and which often counteracts the efforts of
the best instructors, is to be found in the home discipline. Parents do not see the importance of
shielding their children from the gilded temptations of this age. They do not exercise proper
control themselves, and hence do not rightly appreciate its value.
Many fathers and mothers err in failing to second the efforts of the faithful teacher. Youth and
children, with their imperfect comprehension and undeveloped judgment, are not always able to
understand all the teacher's plans and methods. Yet when they bring home reports of what is said
and done at school, these are discussed by the parents in the family circle, and the course of the
teacher is criticised without restraint.
Here the children learn lessons that are not easily unlearned. Whenever they are subjected to
unaccustomed restraint, or required to apply themselves to hard study, they appeal to their
injudicious parents for sympathy and indulgence. Thus a spirit of unrest and discontent is
encouraged, the school as a whole suffers from the demoralizing influence, and the teacher's
burden is rendered much heavier. But the greatest loss is sustained by the victims of parental
mismanagement. Defects of character which a right training would have corrected, are left to
strengthen with years, to mar and perhaps destroy the usefulness of their possessor.
As a rule it will be found that the students most ready to complain of school discipline are
those who have received a superficial education. Having never been taught the necessity of
thoroughness, they regard it with dislike. Parents have neglected to train their sons and daughters
to the faithful performance of domestic duties. Children are permitted to spend their hours in
play, while father and mother toil on unceasingly. Few young persons feel that it is their duty to
bear a part of the family burden. They are not taught that the indulgence of appetite, or the
pursuit of ease or pleasure, is not the great aim of life.
The family circle is the school in which the child receives its first and most enduring lessons.
Hence parents should be much at home. By precept and example, they should teach their children
the love and the fear of God; teach them to be intelligent, social, affectionate, to cultivate habits
of industry, economy, and self-denial. By giving their children love, sympathy, and
encouragement at home, parents may provide for them a safe and welcome retreat from many of
the world's temptations.
"No time," says the father, "I have no time to give to the training of my children, no time for
social and domestic enjoyments." Then you should not have taken upon yourself the
responsibility of a family. By withholding from them the
time which is justly theirs, you rob them of the education which they should have at your hands.
If you have children, you have a work to do, in union with the mother, in the formation of their
characters. Those who feel that they have an imperative call to labor for the improvement of
society, while their own children grow up undisciplined, should inquire if they have not mistaken
their duty. Their own household is the first missionary field in which parents are required to
labor. Those who leave the home garden to grow up to thorns and briers, while they manifest
great interest in the cultivation of their neighbor's plot of ground, are disregarding the word of
God.
I repeat, it is the lack of love and piety, and the neglect of proper discipline at home, that
creates so much difficulty in schools and colleges. There is a fearful state of coldness and apathy
among professed Christians. They are unfeeling, uncharitable, unforgiving. These evil traits, first
indulged at home, exert their baleful influence in all the associations of daily life. If the spirit of
kindness and courtesy were cherished by parents and children, it would be seen also in the
intercourse between teacher and pupil. Christ should be an honored guest in the family circle, and
His presence is no less needed in the class room. Would that the converting power of God might
soften and subdue the hearts of parents and children, teachers and students, and transform them
into the likeness of Christ.
Fathers and mothers should carefully and prayerfully study the characters of their children.
They should seek to repress and restrain those traits that are too prominent, and to encourage
others which may be deficient, thus securing harmonious development. This is no light matter.
The father may not consider it a great sin to neglect the training of his children; but thus does
God regard it. Christian parents need a thorough conversion upon this subject. Guilt is
accumulating upon them, and the consequences of their actions reach
down from their own children to children's children. The ill-balanced mind, the hasty temper, the
fretfulness, envy, or jealousy, bear witness to parental neglect. These evil traits of character bring
great unhappiness to their possessors. How many fail to receive from companions and friends the
love which they might have, if they were more amiable. How many create trouble wherever they
go, and in whatever they are engaged!
Children have claims which their parents should acknowledge and respect. They have a right
to such an education and training as will make them useful, respected, and beloved members of
society here, and give them a moral fitness for the society of the pure and holy hereafter. The
young should be taught that both their present and their future well-being depend to a great
degree on the habits they form in childhood and youth. They should be early accustomed to
submission, self-denial, and a regard for others' happiness. They should be taught to subdue the
hasty temper, to withhold the passionate word, to manifest unvarying kindness, courtesy, and
self-control. Fathers and mothers should make it their life-study that their children may become
as nearly perfect in character as human effort, combined with divine aid, can make them. This
work, with all its importance and responsibility, they have accepted, in that they have brought
children into the world.
Parents must see that their own hearts and lives are controlled by the divine precepts, if they
would bring up their children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. They are not authorized
to fret and scold and ridicule. They should never taunt their children with perverse traits of
character, which they themselves have transmitted to them. This mode of discipline will never
cure the evil. Parents, bring the precepts of God's word to admonish and reprove your wayward
children. Show them a "thus saith the Lord" for your requirements. A reproof which comes as the
word of
God is far more effective than one falling in harsh, angry tones from the lips of parents.
Wherever it seems necessary to deny the wishes or oppose the will of a child, he should be
seriously impressed with the thought that this is not done for the gratification of the parents, or to
indulge arbitrary authority, but for his own good. He should be taught that every fault
uncorrected will bring unhappiness to himself, and will displease God. Under such discipline,
children will find their greatest happiness in submitting their own will to the will of their
Heavenly Father.
Some parents -- and some teachers, as well -- seem to forget that they themselves were once
children. They are dignified, cold, and unsympathetic. Wherever they are brought in contact with
the young,-- at home, in the day school, the Sabbath school, or the church,-- they maintain the
same air of authority, and their faces habitually wear a solemn, reproving expression. Childish
mirth or waywardness, the restless activity of the young life, finds no excuse in their eyes.
Trifling misdemeanors are treated as grave sins. Such discipline is not Christlike. Children thus
trained fear their parents or teachers, but do not love them; they do not confide to them their
childish experiences. Some of the most valuable qualities of mind and heart are chilled to death,
as a tender plant before the wintry blast.
Smile, parents; smile, teachers. If your heart is sad, let not your face reveal the fact. Let the
sunshine from a loving, grateful heart light up the countenance. Unbend from your iron dignity,
adapt yourselves to the children's needs, and make them love you. You must win their affection,
if you would impress religious truth upon their heart.
Jesus loved the children. He remembered that He was once a child, and His benevolent
countenance won the affections of the little ones. They loved to play around Him, and to stroke
that loving face with their innocent hands. When the Hebrew mothers brought their babes to be
blessed by the dear Saviour
the disciples deemed the errand of too little importance to interrupt His teachings. But Jesus read
the earnest longing of those mothers' hearts, and checking His disciples, He said, "Suffer little
children, and forbid them not, to come unto Me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."
Parents, you have a work to do for your children which no other can do. You cannot shift your
responsibilities upon another. The father's duty to his children cannot be transferred to the
mother. If she performs her own duty, she has burden enough to bear. Only by working in unison,
can the father and mother accomplish the work which God has committed to their hands.
That time is worse than lost to parents and children which is devoted to the acquirement of
wealth, while mental improvement and moral culture are neglected. Earthly treasures must pass
away; but nobility of character, moral worth, will endure forever. If the work of parents be well
done, it will through eternity testify of their wisdom and faithfulness. Those who tax their purses
and their ingenuity to the utmost to provide for their households costly apparel and dainty food,
or to maintain them in ignorance of useful labor, will be repaid only by the pride, envy,
willfulness, and disrespect of their spoiled children.
The young need to have a firm barrier built up from their infancy between them and the world,
that its corrupting influence may not affect them. Parents must exercise increasing watchfulness,
that their children be not lost to God. If it were considered as important that the young possess a
beautiful character and amiable disposition as it is that they imitate the fashions of the world in
dress and deportment, we would see hundreds where there is one today coming upon the stage of
active life prepared to exert an ennobling influence upon society.
The parents' work of education, instruction, and discipline underlies every other. The efforts
of the best teachers must
often bear little fruit, if fathers and mothers fail to act their part with faithfulness. God's word
must ever be their guide. We do not endeavor to present a new line of duty. We set before all the
teachings of that word by which our work must be judged, and we inquire, Is this the standard
which we as Christian parents are endeavoring to reach?--Review and Herald, March 21, 1882.